vanity of vanities, all is vanity

I missed the first two weeks of cross country practice at Edina because I was hanging out at the World Champs. It was great to be there today and have all the boys ask about the experience. I needed that. There are lessons to be passed on to these boys. Big lessons.

Yet, I am still digesting the whole Berlin experience. One of the biggest lessons I have taken away from 'it' ... sometimes it's okay to get sad or angry or depressed afterwards. But rather than fight against it like it's wrong and some kind of disorder, maybe I just relax into the emotion(s) and ride it through until it's over. Even though it didn't happen exactly how I envisioned, it doesn't have to be a gut-wrenching experience.

It's good to experience these extreme emotions: it let's you know you're alive and feeling.

I realize I am way too hard on myself most of the time. But I wanted more than just the fair performance that it was. I am not a 2:18.41 marathoner. I just am not.

I do this thing for the right reasons. I really hope these reasons are enough. I cannot wait for the next marathon.

chester copperpot thanks a lot

I had a 25 minute run today that I needed to have. Feeling-wise. The surge felt good as well.

Fortune favors the bold.

-Mr. Camp, a Vietnam Vet

you're a runner, baby, you're a runner, a runner wild and a runner steep

Todays thoughts: some words of wisdom that brought me back to reality. I cannot stress this enough...what is written below was very, very clutch. C-L-U-T-C-H.

Warning copyrighted material here (CMW):

You're head is talking to you because you REALLY feeakin care about this thing on Saturday. I mean its the most important thing you care about right now, THE most. And that is spectacular, because you're getting to do something very few people can ever say they did..... Represent the usa in a WORLD championship in something sooooo close to your heart.
When we care, about anything that important to us, doubts creep in, we zero in on the what ifs the "is this really happening", the "should I really be here" stuff. Especially in running when thousands of things you do, from deciding to go in early on a Friday night, the workouts, the sleep, the decisions you've made that create your days all build into this one thing.... Starting at 11:45.

Why should you have doubts when stuff has gone right? You have the proof. Its such an honest sport and you haven't been half assing. You've done stuff right. So don't doubt..... Be nervous, scared, in awe of the anticipation, but just don't doubt.

We watched the men's 10k at the track. Dathan looked very strong. But Bekele. The stride of Bekele is simply amazing. It did not matter if he was running 62s per lap of 67s, it was just fluid. I wondered if he ever has experienced the pain of distance running the way I have experienced it. Or does pain even exist within his body when he is out there. Anyway, seeing him run live was something else. Also, the men's 100m medal ceremony was last night. 9.58. Sick. If I ever find out that Bolt is dirty, I will hunt him down and kick him in the nuts.

and i hear that train callin just beggin me to go

Reebok hospitality here in Berlin is second to none. Simply amazing. The routine: jump on the bus with Ed, 30 minutes later pull up to the busstop right next to the Marriott (right on the marthon course by the way), head to the suite, eat fabulous meals, did I mention fabulous meals are eaten here. And the company in the room is fantastic as well. JT and Patrick - cannot thank them enough. There is a Starbucks (aka bucks) right next to the Marriott as well. No JFL or White Uncle Phil in this one though. That just made me laugh. Reebok has internet in the suite as well, but the computers have basically the European keyboard so the y and the z are reversed (among others) and I have to keep erasing the dang z or y. Irritating, but not
reallz(y). Also the physios Reebok work with are also outstanding. Canadians but I won't hold it against them.

Anyway, there is a course tour tomorrow which I am mo def going to take. The weather for Saturday as of today is high of 68°F and raining. Yesterday, it was forecasted as 72°high and partly cloudy Bottom line is it changes so much, and I am not believing the weather until the day of.

The workout Friday was deese. Ran 6 miles in 29:40 or so on a sidewalk/bikepath next to a river. Out and back. Kind of felt like a zombie out there as it was neither hard nor easy. Not sure what type of gauge it gives me for Saturday. But I do know that I feel a heck of a lot better than I did last Monday so that is good.

Nap time. Edwardo is getting on my case (surprise, surprise) to head back to the hotel. Be good, people.

i'm just a penny on the train track waitin' for my judgement day

Woooo doggy. Lots and lots and lots of things going through my head right now. The story and especially the spirit of little Shannon is occupying nearly every one of my thoughts. And this is good, because it brings about a really unique feeling of pride and motivation. Like I want to just do what I am about to do a week from tomorrow for every single person fighting to live their own life. And her story I just learned about...a story of a 7 year old fighting terminal cancer, but having the most positive attitude and energy about her. Thanks CMW for sharing that with me. Honestly, I cannot do it justice explaining the feeling(s) I experienced reading through it.

So in about an hour I am running 7 miles at marathon pace with some surges. With DB. And this will pretty much polish off 10 or so weeks of what has probably been the most amazing summer of my life. And not a whole lot of really crazy, fun stuff has happened. But seriously, the experiences I have had over the last 4 months or so have contributed to a very different attitude/perspective on life. And it's all positive. And the way some of the things have unfolded and some of the new relationships that have developed out of this, this unfolded-ness (is that even a word), are just nearly unbelievable.

Last night, which was the second night and usually one of my worst when traveling overseas, was not half-bad. 3 hours of solid sleep, 2 awake with some ipod time, and 4 more solid hours of sleep. No complaints. Tonight should be better, and then from there hopefully just as normal as possible. No naps for now which kinda bites, but soon enough. I plan on sleeping so much next week, that people will probably think I have left the Estrel.

So off to do the tempo. Must go get one more cup (very small european style cup) of coffee. My head and heart are in this thing.....hope yours is too.

i see the sun ahead, i ain't never looking back all the dreams are coming true

Made it to Berlin, Germany, safe and sound. Left MSP yesterday around 3:30, arrived Amsterdam 8am, and Berlin around 10. Got the credential, per diem, athlete info, etc.....first thing I did was exactly what I wasn't going to do. Nap. For 3 hours. But I was exhausted. This will be a short post because I need to hit the sack. But the hotel is very nice. Estrel. Tomorrow is a workout, but that may get pushed if I don't get adequate sleep. Or at least what's adequate for traveling to Europe from the US. Katie and I are heading to Reebok hospitality over at the Marriott tomorrow around 11:30. I will update on a daily basis here in Berlin hoping that people are actually following. Here's what my week has looked like since last Saturday:

Sat (2 weeks out) 18 miles in 1:55 in 90 degree temps and Annapolis, Maryland, style humidity.

Sunday Scheduled day off

Monday am 4xmile in high 4:30s. Not feeling the way I wanted. Lundo assures me this is the marathon peak at work. PM 31 min

Tues My good buddy Zac does dispense the best advice at times. Thanks Schen-del for helping me keep the perspective for this thing. 74 min run into Cedar Lake trails with some strides after.

Wed 61 min here in Berlin with Eduardo. Nice little (stress little) forest 10 min from hotel. Heckuva stretch following.

Positive energy people. Positive energy.

where would i be right now if all my dreams had come true

The last two weeks before a marathon basically suck. You go from running a total of around 2hrs+ a day to an hour, hour and a half. And it makes you feel like you ain't doing jack squat, and that your fitness will be lost, and all that crippity crap. So here I am in the Bucktown neighborhood of Chicago, hangin' out with Megan my bro Mike's girlfriend, hazelnut latte already has passed through the system, trying to get my butt out the door for 50m-hr of running knowing fully well that this is it for the day, and I just can't get it going. The last two weeks before a marathon basically suck.

i gotta say that today is fresh, and tonight ain't nobody gonna get any rest

Made it 29 and half yesterday in 3 hrs. Never forced any sort of pace, just let it happen the way it happened. All of a sudden I was clicking off sub 6 minutes per mile. Some days, 'IT' is just there - for any number of unexplainable reason(s) - where you feel like you could run forever. And it is so stupid because Sunday (by the say I was wearing wind pants, tshirt, and hooded sweatshirt with a headband and hood pulled over my head to make it hot since it isn't here in the 612) I felt terrible for the first 63 minutes of a 65 minute run. Gotta love marathon training!

So I leave for Germany two weeks from today. IT'S AUGUST. For all that is fair and just, IT'S AUGUST...so many emotions flowing through me right now. I think the training is all there....now will Matt's body and mind cooperate on August 22. I mean the objective is simply to avg 505s for 26.2. How hard can it be - right?!

Not much else is going on at the moment. Hopefully, I can pull out a good story or two over the next few days to liven this deal up a bit. All the best to my cousin Casey this weekend, and Tina too, with the nuptials. Should be a good time. Looking forward to seeing the fam.

Ironically I will be doing a final longish run Saturday in Germantown. Albeit Wisconsin. But still Berlin, Germany - Germantown, WI. The karma here is fantastic.

http://dailynews.runnersworld.com/2009/08/a-brief-chat-with-matt-gabrielson.html

fight like a brave don't be a slave no one can tell you you've got to be afraid

On Friday I learned a fairly tough lesson. And that lesson is that marathon training, can at times, be a B-otch. For July, I avg'd 129 miles per week, and I fully believe it caught up to me performing 4000m repeats on this difficult hilly loop over in St. Paul. The legs....H-E-A-V-Y. The breathing....h_e_a_v_y. I love it. I loved that I didn't lose focus when it started to get tough. I'm ready. The evaluation: we learned it's time to cut back a little, freshen up, and get the body rested during the next 3 weeks. I still avg'd under 5 min pace for 15 miles broken up, but even still that thing got the best of me. On the other hand Antonio effin Vega looked outstanding. He is rounding into form and will run a VERY fast fall marathon. I think we'd agree that we just need the killer instinct to surface come race day and then.....

I love this commercial so much. Even though Coca-cola classic holds a special place in my heart...